The Philosophy Of The Little Grasshopper

Monday, January 18, 2010

Plans To Build Toy Box

do shit but what you can do

'm on vacation, most of the day (if not all day) I spend at my house, maybe you do because I am very ambitious (at not getting a job or a boyfriend of the season, as many often do) or simply trying to "seize" the most of this season -sleeping until 9:00 am, breakfast in bed watching "Comic" or those early morning programs Colombian television, a symbol of idiocy and why I'm not proud of being Colombian (ie partial); finished reading that book had not had the opportunity given the many academic activities and become a fan fucking pussy how much is in the "Carelibro" visit (with no sexual interest, but if by gossip) the ManHunt that ... and I found some gems (my ex-boyfriend, my best school friend, best friend my best friend from university, the ex-boyfriend of my ex-boyfriend), in a nutshell this site gathers virtually "all" those ", per se ... Quite different.

However I'm tired of the holidays, and even if it is not because I go next semaname trip, I would go to study as soon as possible .. I know it sounds but the most prudish "ahhh home to me is knowing what the pigeons shit," that is becoming so monotonous, see the face of my younger brother, without mentioning a word, to perceive their attitude of superiority over my

- "Ahh, it's ten in the morning and this idiot is still in pajamas, has not tended bed, there as a vile hindrance watching TV and eating what I have prepared .. Ehh what Unhappy "

never mentioned anything about my brother, and certainly I must admit that at times like these, the Holidays," is when I better I know, because we are part of the day together.

He has 18 years, is about to enter his first semester of college, though he is younger than me, is taller and robust (if he ate his vegetables wise) is more creative and disciplined " Son of a bitch "to me. He has much ego and not ... he does not use that shampoo.

Today we were having lunch when I asked something about a mattress that had seen yesterday with my parents in a warehouse superstores, his answer made me very uncomfortable (not because I had mentioned some sort of position contained in the Kamasutra), was simply because it made me feel like a more stripped, where what he thinks and believes is more than the others.

was so bothered me so much his attitude and his words to me, which gave him a "Punching across the nose with my index and middle fingers," and did not know what reaction he would.

I and as usual when "fucked", I went to run, thinking he would come to destroy "That Flesh fleeing." To my surprise he stayed in the dining room table very quiet and there entered my mom.

The next scene immediately reminded me of our childhood, he began to mourn (it did so "angry" but not because she had felt hurt "That I-)

As his tears made me feel more responsible for my outburst, telling me things like:

- "Those who stick to the face are Guariche" ; - "is that you are a fag ... men stuck in the body, not in the face" . And the cruelest thing is that he was absolutely right in that regard.

finished lunch, my mom, My brother and I, my mother being an intermediary for "Breaking the tension." At the end note that he had "poked" the left eye and I felt much more wreck. Then my mom approached me cautiously and whispered that he apologize to him (my brother).

That happened about six hours ago, and already being 9:56 pm I have not initiated any discussions with him. And I understand if he did not talk to me, I acted like everything I hate most.

And what hurts me most besides the previous situation ... I do not know to apologize to a person who has hurt and that makes me feel very, very vulnerable.

From this virtual environment (for now, as I face what tomorrow will come) - "Ole Andrew, excuse me, really know that I screwed up really bad. About the "punch" I did on impulse, I do not want to hurt (in fact I think I am more hurt than you). I hope not to create any type of grudge but ... Please, leave part of being well (Like what?, Like me, that is, an impulsive, half-contemptuous and fucking time). "

Sunday, October 4, 2009

24-hour Laundromat Manhattan

"Yes," sighed the Colonel. Life is the best thing ever invented. "

Another year older, twenty years. Three years ago wanted to be an adult, would be a pre-school today. Unfortunately

time has not come back, and every day becomes our staff, and our club at a time. What makes

was ten, fifteen, twenty, and twenty ...
From what I know for sure is that, as Heraclitus would argue, "no one bathes twice in the same river," I'm not the same as before . I think I've changed, I'm not sure whether for better or worse but I changed.

would be difficult to try to synthesize two decades in a few lines, but now come to my head "ciudadadano" the pampering of my grandmother, traveling with my parents, my brother's games, the quarrels with my cousins, Barbie afternoons with my cousins, the pool of Flanders Villavo River, the Sea of \u200b\u200bCartagena, Miami Beach ... and also my university.

sprout those memories of my first kiss with Diego, my first time with Victor, my first friend at school .. Carlos, like my second love.
So many things have happened, many surprises, some appease spirits, anger encourage other memories based on facts that have already left. This dinosaur

McDonalds, my bucket to play with sand, stick horse, hentai magazine, the video for "Gatas" and lubricant are inanimate objects that have added a dose of entertainment to my life, and what about Rugrats, Pokemon, Ninja Turtles, Sailor moon , Dexter's Laboratory, Gakuen Heaven, Spongebob, Daria .. In short, programs that increased my imagination in a world that then I would set limits on which I had to do as a person and perform, no matter how I feel or how I like. Already

Twenty "Springs" ... which could also be summer, autumn and winter, since my life has never been rosy;'s death my paternal grandparents, the lack that I did my grandparents and family when we lived in Miami, sexual discrimination was a victim of that sometimes in my school, heartbreak and loneliness, the bankruptcy of my father, among other aspects in I do not want them too deeply, because they are not deserving it for a moment "so happy", although I have learned and improved with the problems and difficulties.

is not only thank God who in the almost 240 months has given me everything I was, what I am, and that in what I will become. To my parents who struggle daily to the present and the future of my brother is a thousand times better than them, to all those teachers and professors who have taught me many things, many of which have already forgotten, and those close, some that are not and who really taught me about life.

and twenty years, and eventually, as affirm Lincoln, "what matters is not the years, but the life of the years."

Thursday, August 27, 2009

X18 Warrior Pocket Bike

Death will come and have your eyes ...

like to talk about a guy I saw today in my college, he a young man about 23 years, height 1.70 and of thin build.

wore a sweater and an olive green jeans, longish curly hair, fell slightly in her walk on her face.

not know the place where he was going, I went to my faculty and was on the route that our eyes met:

There he was, his gaze rocked my pericarp and put to boil my cerebrospinal fluid. His look shy and yet so challenging that my femur generated and Perene blink, as rarely happens to see someone.

His eyes, flashes of light, a reflection of so much innocence, so many dreams, desires that the bodily strength would be weak to do them all really.

hidden in those glasses, that her clothes look inside and I was announced as if time was on our side.

His eyes penetrated mine, as if the most intimate, as if thousands of orgasms achieved through a simple look.

And now what will happen "return our eyes to be collected?," Will again be at a glance?, Is the fate conspire so you can look again at their beauty?

lot of stupid, a bit of a dreamer, just a couple of simple men, who were for the first time and unaware of their looks to continue his walk.

Monday, August 3, 2009

Sean Cody Most Beautiful

The Marica with dreams of being Gay

I'm gay .. That is not new to me, I know since I was little, one of the first memories that come to mind right now is that time when she was four and innocently kissed her in a carnal to my cousin for five years, I was a child who preferred to children, something very difficult to understand for me then, and rarely felt when I was in my school and played with children who seemed cute or interesting.

Now I have twenty years, will perform twenty-two months. I'm still gay, and I sometimes wonder why?. What is it that I'm gay?, Why I'm queer in my family, not my cousin, my uncle or even my brother? This series of questions formulated a long time ago when I had not even had my first sexual encounter, long before a man penetrated me and I seem to experience stronger and yet painful at the time when the penis and ass seemed the most unpleasant and unclean, the concept of these body parts changed tremendously in my puberty .. While we certainly do not consider necessary to speak of this phase.

and return to the question that always disturbed me a Why I'm gay?, Throughout my history there were many theories, some who came to reject over time and others that with each passing day, I noticed they had a foundation "pseudoscience."

For example, I attributed to him being a sissy for my dad in his youth had "boyfriends" and as a result of which he married my mom and could not get on with life when I'm homo ... bare, the bug of repressed shame my father attacked me, so I was born gay. I do not know why that assumption, if my dad has nothing sissy.

Another belief was that the day that my father and mother, had their sexual encounter which I was born .. the moon, the previous meal, the egg that month of my mother .., in short, they influence the "reversed."

Well, leaving aside the stories of my childhood, back to 2009, with my day to day with those problems and solutions that appear every day, all my failures and triumphs while .. even a 4.2 in a partial, that is success. Now comes another question: If I'm gay, why am I not like the others?.

I do not like the rumba, whether in Theatron or Mandala (in fact I have never gone, because I think something jartísimo), does not interest me in the least go comparsa comparsa in proving that I'm queer, I do not like to put myself manillitas rainbow, or be the child sex-chic of the university showing that I have put some rag last collection for Yves Saint Laurent, I am not one who has a lot of gay friends, in fact I count my friends on the fingers of one hand and none of them are gay or lesbian, not belting out songs full of Britney Spears or Thalia (incidentally, I hate singers) do not go to the gym and I have a little belly, I am also somewhat shy and reserved and I find it hard to establish trust with someone primerazo. I could go with what to some might seem defects, for me are elements of my personality and that makes me unique and different, and partly I'm glad, but not quite.

Some psychologist might say .. ! We ... but you are glad that you are and as you are - That's good, I would say no. It is very difficult to have something saved and is the smallest bullshit like my ex boyfriend has a boyfriend, and I can not tell my mom or my colleague from the university I feel, as we still do not consider it relevant to tell the whole world (especially my family) I'm gay.

Thus keeping things going, because it hurt more inside I prefer to tell this secret to anyone. And although it admitted that there are periods in which I would like everyone to know what I'm queer, then rest and go into my slumber of passivity and sadness.

I can say, fortunately for me, these days that I have reserved for me, I'm getting to know better, I'm learning to value myself as I am, and think and think better in that he wanted to be.

Today I start a new semester of academic activities, I propose that in addition to obtaining results equal to or higher than the previous semester, a better person. To see if this way I can understand and maintain what being queer is not equal to other gays.